Magic Mirror

Snow White, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo are in the pub having a drink. Snow White says,

"Here's something,"

and she pulls a mirror out of her handbag.

"It's a magic mirror," she says.

"Watch. Mirror, mirror from out of my handbag, who is the fairest of them all?"

"Why you are," says the mirror.

She passes it over to Tom Thumb, saying

"You have a go."

Tom says, "Mirror, mirror from out of Snow White's handbag, who is the smallest of them all?"

"Why you are," says the mirror.

"Here you are Quasimodo, your go," says Snow White.

"No thanks," says Quasi. "I don't like mirrors much."

"Tell you what," says Snow White.

"If you're shy, take the mirror over there in the corner and you can come back and tell us what it says."

So Quasimodo takes the mirror off to the corner table and whispers his question.

A minute later he comes back and says, "Who the f**k's Ann Widdecombe?"